G.RACEFUL
Gracefulness softens care & strengthens trust.
A gentle, respectful environment, that protects dignity and reduces pressure.
…Tone & Manner
Keep tone soft, warm and steady. Avoid sounding rushed, irritated, or mechanical and bored.
Key Pointers: Be graceful in …
…In Interactions
Be patient. Allow extra time for responses without filling the silence. Avoid jumping in, finishing sentences and show a willingness to wait.
…Respect for Personal Space
Approach slowly and from the front, giving people time to register you. Avoid sudden movements or entering someone’s space abruptly.
…Choice of Words
Choose words that protect dignity (“How about a freshen up” instead of “You need a wash”). Avoid blunt, task-focused language that feels cold or clinical. Think kind.
…Care Tasks
Allow extra time for responses without filling the silence. Avoid jumping in, finishing sentences and show a willingness to wait.
…Emotional Softness
Show compassion without pity; warmth without overfamiliarity. Grace is gentle, not gushing.
Example Situations with Milly:
If I respond with …
“He won’t be visiting. I’m sorry but don’t you remember, he died.”
It makes Milly feel… Fresh Grief & Confusion Layered on Pain.
I could say this…
“I need to check on that. Meantime, I was thinking, you look so lovely today. Your last hair cut really suits you.”
a little therapeutic lying and distracting can be helpful
If I say…
“You can't sit here all day. You need to go to the exercise class.”
It makes Milly feel… Shamed with a Loss of Choice.
I could say this…
“I was thinking of joining the exercise class today. Some gentle stretching is just what I need. I’d love it if you’d join me.”
If I say…
“Right, I think it’s time for the toilet now.”
It makes Milly feel… Managed and Pressured
I could say this…
Sit near, gently touch her arm.
“Are you feeling comfortable or would visiting the toilet help?
If she says she’s been, I try to respond gracefully.